What’s In a Name?
by Beth Kozan
Continuing the series on meaningful book titles, here is another book whose title was meaningful to me; it came at a time I needed it. The title was Thank You for Being Such a Pain: Spiritual Guidance for Dealing with Difficult People. I was having a hard time at work. I was unable to sleep because I could not stop replaying the events of the day. Almost every night.
It was the title that caught my eye; otherwise I might not have picked up a book that promised: Spiritual Guidance for Dealing with Difficult People.”
Using the suggestions of the book’s author, Mark I. Rosen, I began to see difficult people less as an obstacle in my path and more as an opportunity to change my way of thinking. I began to see “difficult people” in my family, in my work environment, and even in traffic with new eyes.
This book reminded me that I am in control of the way I respond to the people in the world around me. Someone who intuited my weak spots might be able to get a rise from me that would escalate the encounter, but I didn’t have to respond in the expected way. At any rate, I began to examine my responses in light of a different reality.
Why were these difficult people in my life at this time? Was it perhaps an opportunity for spiritual and emotional growth? By accepting their behavior as theirs and not something I was responsible for, I was able to move on. Let them have their fit; I could remain above the fray.
In some cases I was able, by disengaging from emotional entanglements, to help a “difficult person” solve their own problem by simply offering encouragement.
In December, I’ll write about the last of three book titles that made a difference in my life.
Beth Kozan is the author of the book Adoption: More Than by Chance and the forthcoming Helping the Birth Mother You Know. Beth worked in adoption for 35 years and retired to write. She has many more books than these titles to write and will emphasize and explore the concept of community in her additional books. “Growing up in a close agriculture-based, rural community in Texas, I felt the comfort and bonds of caring for others which is often missing in our busy lives today. Exploring and building communities for today is my writer’s goal.” Follow Beth on Facebook or visit her website, where she reviews books and films featuring adoption.